Old Friends and New Traditions

Sometimes you love someone so much that time and space don't matter.  Sometimes you love someone so much that it transcends "types" of love, and all you want is for them to find their Happily Ever After, and you'd give just about anything to somehow wave a wand and make it happen.  And sometimes the Universe grants your wish in a thoroughly unexpected, but nonetheless delightful way.

(Well, the Universe and the Internet.)

All that to say, I got to see a very old, very dear friend today, whom I had not seen in over a decade.  And I saw him in the company of another, newer (but also quite dear) friend, because I am the Kevin Bacon to the movies of their lives, and sometimes life is a fairy tale, and I'm delighted to be the unwitting fairy godmother.

Fittingly, we took our reunion to a Pumpkin Patch, because where else do you kick it when you have a surplus of magic?

Some people want more legroom in their carriages, I guess.

Nathan and I had actually gone last year with Kayla, when my belly made it hard to actually see (let alone pick up) gourds.  So now we've done it two years in a row, and I'm calling it Officially Tradition now.

Speaking of tradition, I also indulged in my Annual Caramel Apple, painful joint consequences be damned.

Future Jenny O is going to HAAATE ME.

My feet gained like two pounds each, trudging through the patch.

And SOMEONE managed to lose a sock...

...AND THEN he muddied his remaining sock.  I have no idea how he managed it: he was on my back the whole time.

Fox magic, probably.

Dark Bling

It's been a good week for Lady Time.  Last Friday I hung out with my Katie, on Saturday I spent the day with my dear friend Anna, and today I got together with the so-lovely Laurel to get a manicure, and then picnic in the park.

Now, I haven't had a manicure in years- and in fact I haven't even had polish on my fingernails since before Neeps was born, what with his tendency to chew on my fingers- so I was pretty excited by the prospect.  Especially since, seeing as how I'm not climbing much (::coughatallcough::) these days, I actually have really nicely shaped nails.

As Laurel and I walked to the nail salon, catching one another up on our respective lives, a small portion of my brain was running down what color I might want.  I decided I would go autumnal, maybe a grey or possibly a rich copper.  I do love a dark grey nail (so sophisticated!), but I was also feeling the need for something flashy, because I'm me and I love autumn and that calls for celebration!

In the end they had the most amazing dark-grey-shot-through-with-iridescent-glitter, just exactly as though the Universe was looking out for me.  I feel very Magical now.

Seriously it's so awesome I sort of wanted to steal the bottle.

Bonus: it matches my mermaid bikini!

Turns Out It's Take-Your-Child-to-Work Day

...which is awesome, because Neeps's nanny was knock-down-drag-out levels of sick today, and since The Captain is out of town and I didn't have any appointments scheduled, I went ahead and brought The Little Gentleman in with me to the office.  I was feeling a teensy bit guilty about it the unprofessionalism of it all, but then I learned that the Universal Committee for Making Every Day a "Thing" had my back, and I embraced it as something totally planned and on purpose and kicked that guilt to the curb.

Going over some reports.  On Elephants, apparently.

Really it only worked because a) he's such an easy-temperament baby b) he's not mobile yet and c) I was able to work on stuff that was easily-interrupted, like non-sensitive admin maintenance and Continuing Education courses.  I did have a few client calls that required more/all of my focus, but thanks to the aforementioned a) & b), it was all okay.  I have so much respect for those parents who work from home and watch their kids, because I would not excel at that in the slightest.

Puzzling out some data.

 All in all it was a pretty good day, right up until my Katie came by with Rabbit for an unexpected late-afternoon visit, and then it became an awesome day.

A Message From the Universe

Sometimes the Universe sends me exactly what I need:

Will do.

...and sometimes what I need is a dead possum with a balloon tied to it.  Strangely, this was one of those things I didn't realize I needed until I was presented with it.

(I truly wish I could have gotten an actual photo of it, but you'll have to accept this artist's rendition, as I was driving when I saw it on the side of the road, and there was no time to stop.)

The Wise Fox

I was going back through some of my unpublished drafts, and came across one that I started almost exactly a year ago, on 02/16/15.  I thought I would go ahead and share it today, along with some commentary.

***

Sometimes I wonder if my lessening desire for a child is just the natural reaction of having been denied one for so long- coming up on five fruitless years now.  Or rather, five years with nothing but fruit-fallen-too-early-from-the-vine.  But then I think back to how long I wanted Nathan- and that desire never diminished, never- not even when I knew I couldn't have him.

And it comforts me, because I realize that I can trust this lessening desire.  I am not a fox walking away from a cluster of grapes.  I'm just a woman who has changed with time, as we all do.

Nathan and I had a really good talk yesterday, about that change.

***

The conversation that we had (one year ago today) as we drove out to the coast for a day of spontaneous freedom, was about how long he needed me to feel like I no longer wanted children, before we took permanent steps of prevention.  At the time I'd been feeling that way for about two months, and he wanted me to feel it consistently for a year.  I though that was a reasonable request, since I had definitely, in the past, gone through cycles of wanting kids less, and of wanting them more.  We came to that agreement, and I felt an incredible lightness, a sort of freeing, as I said, "Okay, so by our birthdays next year." We spent the rest of the day driving and playing and splashing and photographing and running around with Isis, and generally enjoying our life together without a child.

Of course, as we now realize, Neeps had managed to squeeze in just before the wire.  I technically shouldn't even have been able to conceive when I did- but obviously the Universe knew what was up, and rearranged my internal rhythms accordingly.  The irony was not lost on us, three weeks later, when I found myself staring at a little plus sign that was absolutely unexpected.

But not, in the end, unwelcome.

Meet Neeps

(I'm typing this while Neeps, my in-the-flesh-baby, has lunch.  Thank goodness for nursing pillows, that's all I can say.)

So our new addition has been around for about a month now- I think maybe we're starting to get used to the insane-o concept that we're really, truly parents.  Slowly but surely we're settling down out of the shrieking, "RED ALERT!" method of handling a newborn, into a nice, bio-hazard orange, with occasional flashes of hazmat-y yellow.  Which is to say, we haven't killed or seriously maimed him yet, so maybe we don't actually need to spend our days (and nights) in a state of constant, low-grade panic.

Turns out Neeps is a pretty classic example of an easy-temperament baby, and thank the stars for that, because let me tell you, this shit is hard enough as it is without throwing inconsolable crying into the mix. And it doesn't hurt that he's cute as hell.  Might as well call the human race done, ladies and gentlemen, because perfection has been reached.

Kwisatz Haderach, anyone?

I'm hoping to get back to writing more regularly as my life settles into its New Normal.  Ditto for  being active (which is currently restricted to gentle yoga and walking/hiking: but I should be cleared for climbing and cycling by the end of next week).  I'm also trying to remember to be gentle with and forgiving of myself as I go through the growing-pains of this new life, and to not despair when I spend an entire day doing nothing but laundry and trying-not-to-cry.  I know I'll get the hang of it eventually- probably just in time for everything to go tits-up again when I return to work. But then we'll just get the hang of it all over again, because that's how we do.

His secret is out.

Onward to adventure!

Let's Go

Sometimes things just work out.

vroom vroom

The first time I got pregnant, back in the summer of 2013, Nathan and I realized that we were probably going to have to do something about the Car Situation.  Namely the fact that we were a single-(small)car family with a large and boisterous pit bull, plus a baby on the way- and a propensity for driving out to to the wild to go adventuring, often with quite a bit of gear.  This realization, over 18 months ago, kick-started us into researching just what sort of vehicle we'd want, if we were to get a second one.  And by "us" I mean "Nathan", because in this marriage he is in charge of research, and I am in charge of making sure we can afford whatever it is he's researched.  Partnership, see?  We lost that pregnancy, obviously, but we kept right on looking at cars in the hopes that it might once again become relevant.

We didn't feel any real pressure, which is sort of the ideal circumstances under which to look for a new car- until, that is, I got pregnant again, and then the ante was summarily upped once more.  But again, that didn't pan out... but our desire for a new vehicle stayed piqued because, quite frankly, we realized we were ready for a grown-up car.  That is to say, a car that wouldn't send me into fits of sciatica on long trips, and that we could accelerate onto the freeway with, without sending up a fervent prayer to St. Christopher.  And also butt warmers, because damn technology is amazing, ya'll.

So we looked and we looked, and we agreed that what we'd really want, if only we had the money, was a 2015 Subaru Forester Limited.  Ha ha ha hah.  But we are (occasionally) patient people, and we knew that in a year or two we could probably get said vehicle for the price we were willing to pay.

As all of this was going on, we were also waiting on the outcome of my grandmother's estate, which has been puttering along since 2012.  We weren't depending on the money by any stretch of the imagination, but we did acknowledge that, should it come through, it would certainly make things easier.

And then, last week, it did come through- and literally the next day Nathan found an advertisement for a certified pre-owned 2015 Forester that had every last thing- right down to the color- we had daydreamed about, with only 55 miles on it.  And the asking price?  Almost exactly the amount of the check we'd received.  That's right: a new car for the price of a used car, for the amount my generous grandmother left me.

We took the hint.

Wonderful News, Everyone!

I got some really fabulous news today...

True story.

...but I can't share it quite yet.  By the end of the week, probably.  For now all you need to know is that I am feeling approximately one jillion times lighter in spirit than I have for a very, very long time.