Mindful Parenting

I met up with JT to do a little bit of climbing today, which was fine.  I miss being strong and supple, but the only one keeping me from that is myself, so let's move right along to the better part of the afternoon, which was the two of us sitting in one of my favorite pubs, having a drink (and nachos) and talking about our lives.

In specific we were talking about Mindful Parenting: ie, the need to actually think about what you're doing with your child, to ensure that you're modeling not just the behavior you want them to emulate (difficult enough in and of itself) but also the sorts of behavior that you want them to find acceptable towards them. 

See, JT is the father of a seven-year-old daughter, and recently he's had to change the way he handles photos.  As in, if she says, "I don't want my photo taken," he won't take her photo.  If she says, "I don't like that photo: delete it," he deletes it.  If she says, "Don't post that photo," he doesn't post it.

"In other words," I said, "You're treating her with the respect due an autonomous human."

"Well yeah," he said.  "Because I don't want her thinking, 'Well it's okay for someone to disrespect my wishes if they love me,'  If someone wants her to take nude photos and she doesn't want to, I want her to be used to people respecting and abiding by her decisions regarding herself.  And I want her to be not-okay with anyone who doesn't."

Here's to the next generation, folks: may this shit come so naturally to them that they don't have to think about it.

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